(Source: skyphoi)



U WAS MY BABY. MY FUCKIN SYNONYM APPLE

(Source: no)



kurgs:

skeletongrazed:

skeletongrazed:

what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?

one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean

#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails


katara:

seattl-ite:

katara:

I am sick of people thinking deodorant is optional

i’m sick of people thinking that they can judge others on a normal bodily function and that the only way they can be accepted is to wear something that is harmful/poisonous to your body. just because some men in the 1880’s decided bodily odor was no longer acceptable. 

bitch you stink 




(Source: gatissmark)




notdannyphantom:

Dude, as a kid, i used to be  like “what is she saying. it’s so smart omfg” but like 6 years later i realize that it’s actually the most general algebraic principle and i am sixteen




halaalpussy:

addictly:

I CANT BREATHE

WUKH WUKH WUKH LIPSTICK IN MY VALENTINO WHITE BAG ???!




pardonmewhileipanic:

BLESS THIS FUCKING CHILD OMG

(Source: meanplastic)



westbor0baptistchurch:

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”



beyoncescock:

seven billion people on this planet and i have 2 friends



politicallyincorrectwalrus:

i love the term “partners”
are we dating?
are we robbing a bank?
do we run a legal firm?
are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit?
who knows.



mydogsnokes:

i miss when i was like 12 and it would be the night before a big field trip or something and i couldnt go to sleep because i was so excited. i miss being so into a book that i would stay up past my bed time reading it. everything seems so bland or something idk. i’m only 19 and everything is so tiring. i miss wanting to be awake




cartel:

passion:

me on the first day of school

(Source: realitytvgifs)




kingsleyyy:

i swear it would be easier to explain if someone looked over my shoulder and saw me watching porn than to explain some of the posts on my damn dashboard…this being one of them

(Source: iraffiruse)



maxipaddles:

christmas death 2001

maxipaddles:

christmas death 2001



Tiny Hand